Kosher for Lent

     Fish on Fridays.  A time honored tradition especially during the Lenten season--the forty days before Easter. Actually, any vegetarian dish will do when you're at home.  But what happens when one goes to an exciting food festival like the  Eat Drink Perth  celebrations which last the entire month of March?  The Twilight Markets are held every Friday in the center of the shopping district.  Lots of different food stands from different nationalities serving up wildly different dishes.  It's a challenge for the taste buds and Lenten reserve. What constitutes kosher for Lent?

Croc   &   Roo

       For example, the Australian tent is serving up Skippy-on-a-Stick (a skewered kangaroo sausage) and  Croc-on-a-Stick  (lose a fight with Mick Dundee and you, too, could find yourself on a short pole).    Pretty safe to say that kangaroo is not a 'legal' option.  But what about crocodile?  Do reptiles count?  And that brings amphibians to mind.  Frog-on-a-stick.  Those toads spend as much time in the water as fish do...and so do crocodiles  come to think of it.  The discussion of how these water animals did or did not qualify went up and down the line waiting to be served.

      I tried the Croc-on-a-Stick.  Slightly gamey  taste (it's those four legs) but the texture was rather mealy (I'm thinking grain here). 

Japanese dim sums

genuine paella

     Of course  there were other choices. It was fun watching the lady in the Japanese tent turn over the pot stickers in their individual cooking cups with speed and grace. The mystery contents were enough to rule it out.   
     The Spanish paella was gorgeous, colorful and legal. But all those mussel shells get in the way of serious chowing down.  Not to mention that the last time I ate mussels I ended up in a hospital emergency room.  I gave it a miss.

East Indian in Copper kettles

   Look at the beautiful color here at the East Indian tent.  I happen to be looking at those handsome copper pots.  You might be looking at the colorful contents.  All legal at this stand but truth is I don't like curries. And I abhor the smell.  Curries are banned from our house although Kev will make one when I am out of town on business and then fumigate the house before I get home.  This is a real big miss.  Have I pointed out those really lovely pots yet?

      We took stock of the situation and decided that speared reptile was enough, all sorts of vegetables at home just waiting to be eaten. .  The food and festive atmosphere makes this a great event...just on the wrong day of the week. 

Writing Postcards When Abroad

    I have a lot in common with elite athletes.  O.K. stop laughing already. World class athletes employ visualization techniques as part of their preparation for competitions.  I use the same methods to imagine things in my life.  I didn't buy my first car until I could see (in my head) images of me in responsible ownership of a vehicle.  I didn't start my small stationery business  until I could dream myself in at least part of the role (hey, too many surprises in starting up a business to catch the entire picture.)  And, I didn't start writing this blog until its mission was a clear as black ink to white cardstock.

    This pretty much how my picture postcards get done when I'm on vacation.  I have a list of people and their addresses as a guide. In fact, I used to make labels of addresses & just peel  each address as needed.  It's like checking it off my list --a perfect way to remember to whom one has written.  But paper sizes are different here, so the addresses weren't plumb with the labels and I don't have a printer to regenerate a regular list that has been X'd throughout.  

   So I went mental.    I mentally wrote the postcards, addressed and mailed them.  Then I mentally crossed names off the list.  I have to tell you the downfall of all this visualization  is  the lack of space between image and reality   and  its lack of memory.  I find myself asking, "Did I write to so-and-so yet?" and  answering, "Sure you did, I saw you do it!"   So not efficient a system.  

   Some loved ones received no postcards and other people received two.  Do not put much stock  into this. If you received no postcards, that means I am always thinking of you.  Feel special because I sent two? Ummmm, more like, I can't imagine writing you.  (heh heh heh. ahem)

   I'm going back to checking off names on lists. A lot less mental gymnastics and happier folks at home.

Tasmania : Animals and Architecture

Peacocks everywhere!?

     Tasmania has some gorgeous vistas, but as I review my photos of our recent trip there I noticed that a lot of animals and structures keep popping up. Clearly it all made an impression so I'll share.

Cape Barren Geese

You know all the usual OZ animals but what about these birds?  The Cape Barren geese with their fluorescent green noses reside on Maria Island.  Peacocks seem to be everywhere. Somehow I have always thought of them as rather exotic but  one sees them strolling along so many places in OZ it is no wonder that natives don't give them a second thought.

       What you don't expect to see is a Tom Turkey overseeing an Evandale pub's backyard.  Who shipped turkeys into OZ? Why do I keep thinking of Benjamin Franklin whenever I see one?  What is that poofy white chicken doing in a pub yard, also?  And finally, after spending an hour watching the tom turkey strutting and preening to a supremely disinterested hen,  don't guys ever take the hint and give up?

Echidna

beer swilling pig

 Enough birds.  I was thrilled  to catch an echidna by the side of the road. Those spikey quills stopped me from touching.  I'm thinking maybe pigs do fly, especially Priscilla, the beer swilling mascot at Pub in the Paddock, after a few obliging guests have come around.

Pyengana dairy line-up

Mooooove on, Elsie

 Down the street from Priscilla in the beautiful valley of Pyengana, is a small fully automated dairy. The cows have learned to follow the queue into the milking area and are free to do so 24 hours a day. Milk production is up 20% since this was instituted.  The cows are happy. There is a treat waiting for them at the mechanized milking station. And you can see the massaging brush they can walk through after milking.   This cow really loves this part. Eventually the cow behind her head-butted her out of the way. No need to be a pig about it.

Port Arthur

Bridge in Richmond

Isolated even in prayer at P.A.

 Gotta love those convicts. Built their own prisons and the escapes for everyone else.  This convict-built (who else?) bridge in Richmond is one of the oldest bridges in the country and is still used today. Want to buy a convict-built structure?  Cough up 
big bucks, friend, even for the most simple and derelict of buildings. Heritage comes at a price.

Launceston convict church

We toured a lot of churches. These two are churches for convicts.  Attendance was mandatory and a very different experience depending on where you were. In Launceston, you would sit next to other inmates. In Port Arthur, everyone stands in isolation in their own cubicle.  The ones I feel sorry for...the poor chumps in the microscopic cells underneath the church in Launceston. Coffins for the living, I'd say.

Launceston door knocker

Queen Victoria Museum restroom

   And these last two shots just because I like them.  This is the mother of all door knockers. You can hear it throughout the building and half way down the block. Doubtless the inspiration for Dickens and his Jacob Marley ghost.

   This sink in the ladies restroom was the coolest thing ever.  Hard to see the angle of slope on the bottom marble but there is no splash, no dripping anywhere just a super high-end version of a playground washing station that adds to the Queen Victoria Museum experience.  

   And no, this employee didn't mind washing her hands for me.

Tasmania - Hitting the Highlights

Port Arthur

      The best time of year to visit Tasmania is during its summer, December through  March .  The temperatures are mild  and there are a lot of festivals and events on offer during this time.   If you have lots of time, just follow your nose on roads less travelled for some great discoveries-as you might do anywhere else.  But just like most trips we take, time is limited so let’s hit a few highlights:

     Port Arthur.   You can’t visit a penal colony like Tasmania without visiting at least  one prison and Port Arthur is the best preserved of the lot.  A prisoner’s life was a wretched one and that is abundantly clear here.    No walls or fences and yet, no escape.  Great vistas, though.

     Salamanca Markets.    Go Bohemian, go local, go cheap…just go to the Salamanca Markets every Saturday in Hobart.   Natives and tourists alike enjoy this experience and bargain hunting opportunity.

        Cadbury Chocolate Factory.    Located in suburban Hobart, this is a hugely popular attraction.  It costs $7.50 to  see the high school science lab type presentation of how chocolate is made (hey, no one does factory  floor tours anymore) but the bonus is the huge shopping area with all of the products Cadbury offers.   Locals pay the fee to shop here for their cheap and fresh chocolate.  Cadbury will even mail a huge box of goodies  you’ve  picked out right from the sales floor. Alas, only to an Australian address.

      Hobart Regatta.    A horse race stops humanity in its tracks in Melbourne.  Far more natural for a boat race to seize the public  on an island state.  It’s not just a boat race in February, it’s a long weekend of activities for everyone.  Lots of shoreline to watch the regatta.

      Launceston.      Launceston, at the confluence of three rivers,  has charms Hobart seems to be lacking.  Historic buildings in great condition abound.  The state’s viticulture industry is centered here.  The Cataract Gorge is a lovely place to spend the day.  And my personal favorite Tasmanian National Trust site:  the Old Umbrella Shop.

     Evandale.    Location of the National Penny Farthing Championship Race, home to the Commonwealth’s most decorated soldier,  also home to famous landscape artist Glover, a colonial mansion sits on the hill (Clarendon), an old-fashioned general store anchors the town shopping section and , in general,  looks more England than England.

    Faery Penguins.     Head north to Burnie or Stanley to see faery penguins come out of the sea at night to tend to their nesting chicks on shore.  Vigilant volunteers  are quick to point out the rock-hopping penguins to visitors and quicker to make sure visitors don’t mess with the penguins.   Flash photography is not allowed so the lasting images of this neat experience will be in your head.

    Of course this isn’t an exhaustive list of things to do in Tasmania. But it will get you started  on your journey through this beautiful state.   If you are a walker, you are in great luck.  There are numerous hikes of all durations  here.  Indeed, some of the best places are accessible only by foot.

WHERE TO SLEEP?

     There is no shortage of hostelries in Tasmania although finding an ensuite room (bathroom inside room) for under $100 a night can be tricky.  If you don’t mind a bathroom down the hall, plenty of country pubs offer decent accommodation for less than triple figures.   Three unique options :

      The Empire Hotel.    In Queenstown.    Showing her age a bit but still a treasure.  The central blackwood stairwell is listed with the National Trust!  Supper in their intimate restaurant upstairs is worth while.

      Pendragon Hall.    In Hobart.    So many decommissioned churches are repurposed as art  galleries, museums or homes.  The undercroft of this church is rented out as lodgings.  Awaken to sun filtering through stained glass windows.  Ideal for multiple-day stays as multi-media entertainment and food preparation is possible in this self-contained unit.

      Jail Cell.        Maria Island.     Maria [ma RYE ah] Island is a national park with no services (you pack in, you pack out-including trash) but with an opportunity for people to enjoy plenty of hiking by staying overnight in one of their jail cells.  Surprisingly spacious with a fireplace for cooking and picnic table inside. Coin operated showers in the next building.  A unique experience.

    Pub in the Paddock.   Pyengana near St Columba Falls.   A true country pub—out in the bush, old and with lots of character.  Close to the St Columba Falls and near an excellent dairy which brush massages its cows.  But they’re not the only ones pampered.  Pub in the Paddock has Priscilla, a beer swigging pig.  For a mere buck, you too can share a drink with Priscilla, queen of the paddock.

    

       It is so easy for visitors to Australia to catch the big eastern state cities like Sydney and Melbourne while ignoring gems like Tasmania.   I can’t    guarantee that a Tasmanian Tiger will come out of extinction long enough for you to take a photo of it, but the detour here will be memorable nonetheless.  If nothing else, come here for the only tolerable summer in OZ.

Waiting for my massage

Arrow: Mark of the Convict

Introducing Tasmania

 

Visiting Government House

     First things first:  Tasmania is NOT a foreign country floating somewhere in the Andaman Sea.   It is the island state of Australia at the country’s most southern point.   Actually, it’s a collection of islands much like Hawaii but that’s where the similarity ends.  There is nothing tropical about the weather at this last stop before the Antarctica.  It is entirely more like Wisconsin or Michigan in weather . The western 37% of Tasmania is reserve land,  mountainous and snowbound in the winter.

     Most of its half million people reside in the eastern and northern part of the state.   An interesting bunch, this lot.  Almost everyone is related  to a crook.  Tasmania was settled by the British as a penal colony,  and where this was once a fact to be hidden, most people today embrace their … colorful … ancestry.  There is a lot free spirit found here in the form of ageing hippies and their organic produce and earth friendly products.  Despite the rumors you’ll hear on the mainland, no one in Tasmania has two heads (a not-so-veiled hint at small island inbreeding.)   The state seems to be losing heads to the mainland anyway.   Unemployment in Tassie is the highest in the country.  The apple, beer (Cascade and Boag) , cheese (King Island cheese & beef is second to none!) and tourism industry cannot make this beautiful state more attractive to young workers and industries that would employ them.  Retirees, however, find this a most suitable place.

Oatlands

 

     Another misconception to correct is the Tasmanian Devil.  Warner Brothers got the strong jaw and irritable temper correct but the rest is a bit fanciful.  The Tassie devil is small, black with a white collar. It is also suffering from a facial tumor that has been spreading like wildfire for 15 years now.  Conservation and breeding programs on the mainland (where devils are not found in the wild) are a high priority for the residents of the state.  Unfortunately, this has also brought out bogus organizations looking to capitalize on people’s concern and generosity.      Also capturing the natives’ fancy is the Tasmanian Tiger—more of a canine with stripes and huge mouth than a big cat.  The last Tassie Tiger is said to have died in 1936 but tragics still hold out hope that their sightings and scat collections will resurrect the state emblem.   Just as a matter of interest for all of you wombat fans,  wombats poop perfectly square bricks so identifying their scat is easy enough.

      Some famous Tasmanians:  actor Errol Flynn,  actor Simon Baker (from  “The Mentalist”) and Crown Princess Mary of Denmark  who met her handsome prince during the Sydney Olympics.

PIAF - The Writer's Festival 2012

     You and I have been waiting a whole year for the return of the magic that is the Perth International Arts Festival.  Every possible branch of the Arts is represented here in classic to downright...eclectic...form. My favorite part is the Writer's Festival, a long weekend of speakers and  presentations of interest to anyone who has ever read a book. The matrix scheduling, variety of topics and quality of guests leaves the attending public fairly panting with excitement each hour.

      "Panting" doesn't really describe the reaction to a new offering this year called The Pitch. Twenty lucky people were going to get three minutes to pitch their story ideas  to a local publisher to get feedback or (hold your breath) a nibble.   I was ninth in line.  It all sounded like a fabulous game show and I wanted in because I know I can make an impressive presentation.  Pity I didn't have a finished or near-finished book in hand like most of my fellow line-waiters.  What am I doing here?  I started  to get nervous but not about the pitch. Better showman than writer am I.  No, I was afraid the 21st person in line -who had a manuscript and experience pitching it to several agents and publishers already- would thump me one out in the hallway afterwards for killing off their chance with my fancy.

      Yeah well, they should have gotten here sooner I decided and resolved to squeeze in two story ideas. One was based on a real-life gypsy singer (a tale that has been rattling around in my  head since 1996) and  the other winner was to turn this blog into a book. I was so ready when my name was finally called. Cue the dramatic music:

       Vara Panina.  A gypsy singer celebrated by Imperial Russian society. A voice so captivating that world renown jeweler Carl Faberge immortalized her in statuette ... celebrated by but not accepted into Society ... alienated by her own community  ...  unrequited love   ... died young.  Alas, a tragedy not a fairytale.

.....................but  while I still have some time left, let me go autobiographical.   Forget everything you've read by Bill Bryson  ... get a picture of expat life a few pixels at a time a la Erma Bombeck...

       The truth is I have never considered Vara as anything other than a screenplay and said almost as much.  "Vara I can see as a lushly produced movie running behind my eyeballs, but with Postcards From OZ you can taste the Vegemite!"   High drama in place of finished manuscript with loads of industry cred. The publisher, Terri-ann White, at this point usually asks the writer a few questions like: "What is this story similar to?" (The Great Gatsby), "Who is your target audience?" (Umm,  errrr, ummm)  Instead, Terri-ann turned to the audience and asked, "Who would consider buying this book?"   About a quarter of the room raised their hands.   This was unexpected.   She recommends thorough research of the subject and injecting interest and life into the dry facts found.   

       As for Postcards From OZ?  "Keep it on the blog and see where it goes."        Ouch.                     

        Also new this year was shifting some of the free presentations (to make space for all the extra paid sessions -- scowl) to lush groves on the beautiful college campus this was held on. In this regard, Perth's weather is ideal. More than a few bridal couples getting photos taken amongst the greenery, scenic archways and ethereal stained class had to share space with several hundred festival goers and the half dozen peacock pairs that roam the campus.

 

        Let me share a snippet of the publicly displayed art that is part of PIAF.  South Korean artist Choi Jeong Hwa, whose usual medium is mass-produced plastic items, has a couple of interesting installations about town.  The colorful pyramids standing sentinel at the Supreme Court  are made of fish & chip baskets.  The large red lotus flower found on this campus has an oscillating fan inside giving it a happy octopus demeanor.

       
    I'll close here with an exhortation to start saving your pennies.  My new book, "VARA",  is on track to be published in 2028.  MSRP is $45.  Autographs are free.

      

Australia Day 2012, Perth

    Australia Day, the commemoration of the First Fleet from Britain arriving in Australia, January 26, 1788.  New citizens are sworn in, awards for citizenship handed out, a high school or community band will play.  Nothing more than a day off work for the eastern states but embraced by the residents of Western Australia.
   Usually.    Today the spirit was willing but the flesh was weak.  The temperature today shot up to 107F and most of us simply ducked for cover.  Thursday is my radio show day and I hung out at the air conditioned radio station a whole lot longer than necessary.  Licked a 50 cent soft serve ice cream cone from McDonald's while waiting for an air conditioned bus which dropped me off at the air conditioned grocery store.  Did not pick up any of the traditional lamb chops for holiday grilling but did buy a bouquet of blue,white & red radishes as a show of spirit and a lime to swim in my Tanqueray & Tonic.
   Swimming.    Our property pool was closed seven weeks ago for a lack of signage. You know: depth markers, "Do Not Dive", etc.  Hard to believe that  these simple signs would take two months to get done and posted.  Hard to believe also that the pool manager left the gate near us unlocked.  Easy to believe that upon the aforementioned discovery of pool access, Kev & I went for a quick swim despite the "Pool Closed" signs. Have I mentioned the 107F heat (and we don't have air conditioning?)  Fear not, we weren't noticed and the Cricket game was still on TV when we returned ten minutes later.

    Fireworks.    The highlight of many a celebration ...and easily seen from our balcony so we don't need to stray from home to see the big show.  And a good thing there, too.  Clouds from a far north storm had made it to Perth  (along with Cousin Lightning Bolt) just in time for the beginning of the fireworks. Oh dear, this must have scattered people on the foreshore very quickly.   I REALLY like fireworks and appreciate the music that a sponsoring local radio station provides to heighten the experience.  I daresay it is an underdeveloped art here in OZ.  Rousing patriotic tunes are heard in the U.S. with some shows timed to the music even.  Here in Perth, the music tends to sound entirely incidental.  No more patriotic than Rolf Harris' "Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport" with a sampling of INXS and AC/DC (What? No Wiggles tune, also?) and more likely to be Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors."  And the music bed ended way before the finale. Oh well.  The rain stopped as soon as the skyshow did, naturally.

     Tomorrow?     We're back to work.   Happy Australia Day, Mates!