Boxing Day in OZ

    It's absurdly early in the morning yet the shopping mall parking lot is jam packed.  Automobiles are illegally parked on sidewalks and under shade trees with so many more hovering and circling to find a spot of their own.  Frantic shoppers dodge the vehicles as they trot for the mall entrance.  Inside, even earlier arriving shoppers are already standing outside the entrance to the major department store. The line extends the entire length of the glass front and stands eight people deep at any point along the line. Necks crane, eyes strain and mouths gape. A faint buzzer sounds.  The doors open.  The masses stampede into the interior. Shoe sale at Nordstrom's?  The Day After Thanksgiving--also known as Black Friday?
     Nope.  It's Boxing Day, the day after Christmas.  It's a legal holiday here in OZ so most businesses are closed.  And what to do on a day off?  Go shopping.  There is no "official" start of the holiday shopping season here as Black Friday indicates to American consumers. But Boxing Day is extremely well-defined and well-fixed in the Australian mind as THE day to catch big bargains.  Didn't get what you want yesterday? It's on discount today. Hurry! White goods, clothing, perfumes, bedding, fry pans and Christmassy stuff for next year are all marked to move. The socks and underwear section seems rather empty (you didn't get enough "jox & sox" under the tree?) but the buying frenzy is on.  It's madness, I tell you, and not for the faint of heart. Thought you were safe shopping online from home? Nope. One of the major department stores websites crashed because of the heavy traffic on it.  Seems kind of backwards to go so ga-ga after the fact but this feverish exercise in post-holiday commerce could be an Olympic sport in this country.
    Speaking of sport, you have Boxing Day options in this category although both are spectator events for most slugs citizens.  The Sydney to Hobart Race starts on December 26 and will finish a few days later for the super yachts but a week later for sailors in much more humble dinghys.  The aerial shots of the beginning of the race are spectacular and TV coverage does stay live for awhile to show the big guns in action. There are many different classes being competed in so the little guys aren't completely out of contention for a prize. Not much for  water sports? How about Boxing Day cricket.  Cricket is on morning, noon and night--the long and short versions of this baseball-y game--for those who can't get enough of this sport. Watching it on TV where one is close to a fan and the fridge is far more comfortable than buying a ticket to see it in person.  But there are always the tragics who prefer to sit in the hot sun for seven hours for this slow-as-a-glacier action.  In fact, it's tradition for many folks to do just that.
    Now, the question still rolling through your mind:  how did Boxing Day get its name and what does it mean?  You'll get a lot of hemming and hawing when you start asking this question because most people just don't know.  It's British origins have gotten awfully muddled over time.  The explanation that seems to sit well with most people is that the day after Christmas was spent putting money into various poor boxes as a gesture of good will to the less fortunate and gratitude for your own financial blessings. Other translations are less magnanimous.
    So how much of the above did I do?  Not much.  I did drop into the grocery store which was near empty of staff, shoppers and food (last minute locusts cleared off the shelves two days earlier) and picked up the real bargain of the day.  Fresh turkeys were being sold at an 80% discount.  Roasted in in the cool of the evening and popped the meat into the freezer.  Our meal planning is set until 2014!

Open Letter to Dishonest Postal Worker

Dear Dishonest Postal Worker,

    I received a letter yesterday that bore evidence of your petty handiwork.  The paper envelope had been well-thumbed in the center with a slit in the bottom corner.  You felt something through the paper, assessed the potential value of the free floating contents and decided to help yourself.  
    It must have been fairly easy to make that slit in the corner--with your fingernail, perhaps?--slide the object into your hand and then into your pocket. It's busy, no one noticed you tampering with the mail.  Perhaps your colleagues are too busy stealing from other envelopes or maybe doing their jobs properly and with respect.  Quickly you send the letter on its way. What's the harm, you think? Certainly none to you as there is no proof of your duplicity. Paper envelopes can tear easily. Who knows exactly where the contents dropped out?
    You are far from being the only creepy postal worker, pal.  I've traveled a bit and I've  talked to others who have traveled even more.  There is no shortage of postal workers who abuse their positions of trust with the paid correspondence of others and who just plain don't care about the rules they are supposed to work under.  They come from countries one would think have evolved  passed petty larceny (yours!) to Third World countries where we are all too quick to add  dishonesty and  lack of pride  to their blighted face of humanity.  Some people may not even be cognizant of the effect of their actions.  Travel through the back roads of some South American countries and pop into their post offices.  Look on the wall, pretty picture postcards of faraway places decorate the dreary space. Why deliver those cards when they look so nice in our office?  We can enjoy them, also.    Others know exactly what they are doing and take the opportunity to let the recipient know that they can get away with fleecing the postal customer.  Companies doing business in places like Nepal do not send important things through the mail but use private courier service.  How many aid workers and expats have  relatives who send care packages only to find  that  a postal "inspector" has redirected the goodies into their own satchels but decide to put the empty wrapper back into your box. Why the mean tease? Because they can get away with it. No one will find me. Besides, those foreigners don't need or deserve these goodies as much as I and mine do.   Yeah, Creep, you are part of a dubious brotherhood.
    So what did you get from my envelope?   A USB.  Filled with corporate secrets  you can sell to the highest bidder?  Maybe some interesting pornography? Actually,  a friend was sending me a copy of an old holiday TV show that I grew up watching every December but does not exist in Australia, "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."  The stop-action technology is absolutely ancient but its lessons are still salient.  And it gives me joy to watch it as an adult just as it did as a child.  I hope you enjoy the show.  And maybe you will learn a lesson.

"Let's be independent together!"
© Classic Media

   What have we learned here? Well, small packets are safer than letters for very small items to be sent. But if a paper envelope is the go then it is prudent to tape the small item (ring, key, coin, USB, etc.) to a piece of cardboard. That would make it more difficult for the item to be squirreled out of a tear in the envelope by a postal thief. I suppose a small prayer to the mail gods wouldn't hurt. 
     Merry Christmas, Grinch.